March & April Horoscopes

Illustrations by Jess Hock ~ 


ARIES (March 21–April 20)

April Fool’s Day won’t fool any of you fast-talking, fast-acting Fire Babies! You’re on it, and so help those who try to pull the wool over your eyes. You’ll need to calm down around mid-March until the first week of April so you don’t set yourself on fire, instead — but you’re ready for love, and you will have it. Stay careful of your “it” factor attracting undesirables; you’ll find yourself having to sneak out of town in the dead of night!


TAURUS (April 20–May 21)

OK, Bulls: If you don’t find something to inspire you as you come out of the winter fog, the herd will leave you behind. Being alone as you approach spring will have you feeling lonely and out-of-sorts. Time to shed that winter weight and put some veggies on the plate; you’re a Venus child, and this is not the time for indulgence with no off-switch. Love is coming. Get ready and get fit for action!


GEMINI (May 21–June 21)

Dear Twins: From the end of March to mid-April, use this time to do some internal work. You’ll need your peak form heading into summer! You’re a mutable sign, and it’s time to act like it. Too much stagnation and heavy energy over the past few months has made you irritable and withdrawn. You’re a social creature by nature, and you will become a butterfly by summer!


CANCER (June 21–July 23)

You Crabs won’t feel much like getting out and about until the first week of April. Then, BAM! The diva has arrived! You enter that watery stage and perform an aria that astounds us all. What else have you been hiding from us, you sneaky little thing? You may not come out very often, but it’s a huge deal when you do — and you get a lot done in that small amount of time!


LEO (July 23–August 23)

Starting around March 15, you big Cats will need to stretch and find your way out of the den. You need lots of sun! You have much to catch up on, especially the gossip you’ve missed while hibernating through winter, and all of your adoring fans have missed seeing you in the circuit. They’re wondering what fabulous trend you are about to set this spring. Remember your motto: “Go big or go home!”


VIRGO (August 23–September 23)

You well-behaved Kids may find yourself acting on impulse around the full moon in Virgo on March 18. It’s well past the time for you to stop being so hard on yourself and let your freak flag fly. You’re all closet freaks, and the world is ready for you! There is nothing better than hanging out with a disciplined wild child gone off the grid, so this is your time to go naked. You won’t be alone in your adventure!


LIBRA (September 23–October 23)

You Libras may find life is going too fast, right now, and you must work hard to balance all of the energy coming at you. Don’t worry: You’ll find your feet back on the solid ground around the full moon in your sign on April 16. Your creative juices are overflowing this spring. It may come out in some zany art projects, or you may redesign something old. But it will spark a profitable new business or venture, so be up for anything!


SCORPIO (October 23–November 23)

As a fixed water sign, you Scorpios are comfortable with emotional routines — even the outdated ones. But that’s about to change as Venus and Mars in Capricorn transit into Aquarius. You may wake up and walk away from all that no longer serves you, straying outside of your comfort zone like a person stumbling into the blinding sunlight after years of living in a cave. Welcome to the new age! 


SAGITTARIUS (November 23–December 22)

Your youthful vitality will be on like Donkey Kong, and sitting still will be painful during this time. Make sure to look where you’re going once you start running. Have a familiar route in mind so you can go into autopilot when the daydreaming starts! You may feel as if you’re a magical tree sprite who can say anything to anyone without offense. But as April ends, you’ll float back down to earth and wonder where you’ve been!


CAPRICORN (December 22–January 20)

You’ve been in your element for months, and now it’s time to go into unknown territory. You’re finally ready for the New Year — it only took you three months! Your slow and steady approach is both a curse and a blessing, but your sluggishness isn’t going to save you from being slung into the “now,” It’s happening, regardless whether you’re ready. Change is the main course on your menu!


AQUARIUS (January 20–February 19)

We are definitely in the “Age of Aquarius,” and freedom is knocking on your door: Expansion, creativity, and progression are all words to describe the tone for mid-March through April. You’re electric, and everyone wants to know who you are. You cannot hide, so don’t try! You may find yourself completely changed and feel like a stranger to yourself — how exciting, another growth spurt! Embrace it all and watch a new chapter unfold!


PISCES (February 19–March 21)

You delightful Sea Creatures, March through mid-April should be a fantastic time for showing off all your iridescent shimmer and magic! Just exercise some restraint and hold off putting it all out there until you have the facts in order. Use your great powers of intuition and listen to your heart. Don’t let your emotions get the better of you; don’t turn from an angelfish into a shark and scare off that new love that swam your way! You will feel free, now. But don’t swim blindly into a whirlpool!

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